A Change of Plan

When last I left you Mom was struggling with her second dose of the new chemotherapy. About a day and a half after her dose she arose again to join the family. It was amazing to watch her transformation from the retching, hallucinating lump in the bed back to the upright cancer warrior she has become. Resurrection once again.

The following days were up and down for all of us. Mom was on and off the couch as this chemo had now taken her body down to the point where she didn't really feel well any of the time. Steve and I continued to ready the house for the new hardwood floor installation upstairs. The workers arrived the Friday after the second chemo to install the new floor and continued to work the next week. This next week we all mainly focused on getting ready for vacation the following week. Maya and Elias went to OSU kidspirit daycamp for the mornings. This was a new, fun experience for them. On that Friday we journeyed up to Canby for the annual Heritage Rose Garden rose sale. There we had a great time purchasing roses for our new rose garden. Both Mom & Dad and Steve & I left rose gardens we were very attached to at our old houses. It was fun to purchase a new start for a rose garden at Buchanan st.

Our week of beach vacation at Netarts Bay was wonderful. We were joined there by Jeremiah, Nan, and Sam; Aunt Patty and her friend Joan; Grandma and Granddaddy; and my friend Cedar. The week was filled with beach walks, sand castle building, kite flying, movie watching, game playing, puzzle working, eating, and baby oogling. Mom was a mostly happy participant in all of this. She did not get to go on as long of walks as normal and was less tolerant of the constant draining beach wind, but managed the higher level of stimulation with some nice naps on the couch.

Our family of six was a bit apprehensive for a variety of reasons about going home as the week at the beach came to an end. Steve and I were not looking forward to the work we had in front of us to get the house back together as the floors would be done when we arrived home. Also, this would be Steve's last week of summer vacation. The kids could feel the end of their summer vacation nearing as well. Elias had some anxiety about going to kindergarten. Dad had to confront returning to work and all the approaching September programs. Mom of course had another round of chemotherapy waiting for her the Tuesday after we arrived home.

Monday after we arrived home Mom had an appointment to see Dr. Kenyon her oncologist. At this appointment Dr. Kenyon asked her about her experience with the last round of chemo. As Mom related her story Dr. Kenyon had some concerns about how her body was reacting to this chemotherapy. He and Mom both questioned if continuing this chemotherapy is the best plan. He then examined Mom's breast. From this examination he was not able to feel any cancer at all. He and Mom then continued with a conversation about what is the best path forward at this point. Mom questioned him extensively how stopping this chemo or continuing this chemo might impact her outcome. Dr. Kenyon does not really know. He does know that Mom has already done the majority of the work by completing the first 12 weekly chemos. These last proposed 4 chemos were always presented as the more experimental phase of the treatment. Whatever Mom does at this point the research shows that there will be about an 80% chance of there still being cancer in the area after surgery. There has only ever been a 20% chance that the cancer will be completely gone at the point of surgery. This being said, the possibility that Mom will have to do more chemo after surgery is very high regardless of if she were to continue with these 2 more pre-surgery chemos. Also, Dr. Kenyon said that the chemotherapy that would probably happen after surgery could be a different mix of chemo than the one she is working her way through now. So, Mom and Dr. Kenyon took this all into consideration and decided to change the course of treatment. Mom is stopping her current chemo and will proceed to surgery in the very near future. She has an appointment with Dr. Faddis this Friday to set a date for the surgery. Dr. Kenyon said it will take place some time in the next two weeks.

It is very important to us that this change of plans is not seen as negative. Mom is still doing everything she can to beat this cancer. There are different roads to the same end. The doctor and Mom believe that going ahead with the surgery and not taking her down any further with this chemo is the best thing to do. Mom's proposed course of treatment is a work in progress, not a holy document. I know that I found safety in this plan that we were given early on and that giving it up has been another lesson in recognizing that I am not really in control of any of this anyway. My sense of being able to control what life serves up is false. Beating cancer is an art, not a science.

Mom will continue with the biotherapy herceptin treatments because it is so important for beating her herceptin positive cancer. This means she still gets to visit the infusion center. Dr. Kenyon told her that she will probably keep having every three week herceptin treatments through next March. Radiation is also scheduled in her post surgery time period.

September will now be surgery month for us as well as the start of school and the beginning of many fall church programs. Please keep us all in your thoughts and prayers as we keep busting down this path that is in front of us.

Love, Emily